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Sunday, September 10, 2006
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well well, the sep hols are over before i could take a deep breath and a step back from my busy life. okie, not that bad. but the hol week was much of a music filled week.wed: music space final rehearsal thurs: piano-ing. intense one. fri: music space actual sat: piano, music workshop: guitar sun: christmas choir practice but ironically, hm...didnt feel that i sang much tis week. i feel rather exhausted instead, running around to all these places. and i need a focus to sing. shucks...my voice sucks. rlly dejected at times when i find how much i lack in skills when i sing. its not i dunno wat lacks, its just that i cant achieve it. darn. and can anyone tell me how to make sch life more welcoming? i am dreading it. i'm sick of school. cant believe it, i'm actualli missing medicine and being ill. at least its a form of escape from that terrible place. found that i havent been enjoying going to sch since sec 3. headache arh. its not just about studying...its abt, well, you noe. getting thru trival things and pleasing as much ppl as possible. i am certainly not doing a good job abt it and i noe it. but i dun wanna care. end up tiring myself at the end of the day for wat? i rlly haf to put my time into something else. darn darn darn. and tok abt my bad temper, u guys rlly got on my nerves today. can u all just shut up and listen during sunday sch? i could bearly hear wat the teacher or esther,xiwen or willa is trying to say. i mean u noe there's some wrong info den share it lar. dun just tell the person beside u "nono, she got it wrong lor. loser" tell her lar! on another hand, why talk abt soccer during sunday sch? u could at least lower ur voice vol wat. darn. i might sound harsh today during the lesson but i rlly couldnt take it when u all haf to talk abt every other thing and not abt God in sunday sch. u guys are like just coming to church for the sake of coming. i mean the irony is that we all grew up in church! where's the passion that u guys once haf? or u guys didnt haf one at the very beginning. in wat position do we haf to say that other religion are lame since u dun take ur own one seriously? at least others take their religion wif pride and are willing to defend it wif their lives. u? obviously it doesnt seem to me u guys dun take religion seriously. its not that i'm perfect, i admit i do get drift away at times but at least i'm changing. at the veri least, i dun disturb other ppl. u all dun give a damn. and wat's more? sing among urself when the pastor is preaching?! pls lar, i noe it might be boring at times coz u guys dun understand but try to listen wat. u 3 are not evn making an effort to try! wat good isit when u guys come to church everything but absorb nothing in and not even praising God? pseudo christians are dangerous! dangerous to others AND themselves. okie, okie. gimme sometime, i'll cool down. i'll talk to them nicely and ask them to pay attention. ask them not to make so much noise. be patient wif them. pray for them. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:B |
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the brat loves GOD! loves my FAMILY soar.fri-en-ds.SING and in short, you can call me carmen links
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